partly: (Girl)
I've never been able to use to-do lists. I usually consider a to-do list as a failure list -- at the end of the day, it lists all the things I've failed to do. I've tried to change that because I know a lot of people who use to-do lists and they get a sense of accomplishment from them. But I can't.

I think, in some ways I'm too contrary for the list. I mean, my first response to any order is usually 'hell no', so it's possible that I just do that same thing when I look at the list.  The fact that I made the list doesn't change that reaction at all.

And posting the list so others can read it and hold me accountable? No way am I going to do that. The last thing I need is everyone seeing what a failure I am. I'm usually really good at hiding my ineptitude, the last thing I want to do it put it out for the whole world to see.

There's really no point to this post outside of permanently recording that little slice of crazy that is me.
partly: (Perk)
Well, actually not. But I've friended some new people as of late and thought I could do a little "get to know me post". However, since I'm incredibly lazy about such things, I'm really just going to end up linking to posts that let you know about me.

I updated my Bio at my User Profile page not to long ago and I really think that it's the best summary of who I am. So, if you haven't already, start there.

For more detail I did a list of "100 things about me" many years ago. They are still all true, more or less. You can read it in parts one and two.

Things that may help understand my current state of mind.

  • I'm currently unemployed. I have been since January 1st. Life is squeezing me very hard, right now. My more recent posts illustrate the frayedness I'm feeling. I'm a positive person, though. So we'll see how it goes.

  • My daughter, Myr, is currently a junior is high school. She is still the coolest person I know. I think teenagers are awesome. She is handling this incredibly stressful time of life really, really well. I don't brag about her enough, and I'm not sure if that is possible. She's an artist, a musician, and a scholar. She is kind, thoughtful and self-aware. I love her more than a little and like her more than a lot.

  • My husband, Wil, is also very cool. We'll be married 21 years this October. He currently works at Sears, which is wonderful. What's not so wonderful is that he is an artist and while he's good at his job, it's not what he'd love to be doing. He sacrifices, though, especially with me being out of a job. Life is tough all over, right? We do alright.

  • I like to fancy myself a writer. Not sure I can do that. I've written more in the past week than I have for months and I'm happy with that.

  • I'd love to find a way to earn money at home. While I'm sure that everyone's dream, bringing in a few extra dollars right now would ease the stress. Yes. The not working thing is eating my brain! I am, however, looking at starting an etsy account. I'm rather crafty, my daughter even more so. We'll see how it goes. I'll let you all know when the account is set up.

That's more than enough useless info about me.

A desk!

Jan. 5th, 2006 09:49 pm
partly: (cleandesk)
OMG, I have a desk. It's just not junk on down to the floor. A real desk. With open spance. Wow. (OK not much open space, but any is good for me).

Also, straining my brain multiplying and adding (positive and negative) fractions and mixed numbers. I would do it on the computer but then Myr will want to use it, too. She keeps dropping the negative on the number. Not to mention, both of us are making simple math mistakes. Only since we're working the problems separately but at the same time, we can catch them.

*shakes head* Too sad.

Still...

DESK!
partly: (Sucks To Be Me)
My jaw does not ache.

The tooth that was broken was deemed non-salvageable by the dentist and so he pulled it. No real big surprise because I knew it had damage from a bad wisdom tooth pull many years ago.

Anyhow, the extraction was quick and not too painful. Once the numbness wore off it was pretty good -- only occasional bouts of throbbing distraction. However, Friday night it started to be more annoying and Saturday and Sunday I ended up taking more Advil than I like in order to make the pain tolerable. So today I called up and the Dentist said that I probably had dry socket and that I should go in and they would medicate.

It was a case of the cure being worse than the malady, however. When I went in the jaw wasn't really too sore, I mean, I could go for quite a while without thinking about it. When he cleaned it out, I had my first hint at what was going to happen. Then he took this wad of medicine and packed it into the hole where the tooth had been.

And by "packed" I mean jabbed it into my jaw with what felt like sharp knives.

*whimper*

I can usually handle a little pain. I can box it up into a little part of my brain and forget about it if I have something else to concentrate on. But this... OW. Serious OW.

I came home and laid down. Slept for about an hour.

Woke up to blessed non-agony. Still not sure if the initial pain was worth it but, right now, I am enjoying the normal feeling of no pain. I'm really hoping that this one treatment takes care of it because it's not a treatment I want to suffer through again.
partly: (cleandesk)
Yay for wonderful [livejournal.com profile] imbri6! I received LOST in the mail today. Yippee! We will be able to watch it tomorrow.

Myr and I rode in the Christmas Parade on Saturday. It was a great night for it, not too cold, not snowing or raining. The float was for our church and we got to play with the puppets. We've just started a puppetry ministry and we were showing off the puppets. The kids on the route really, really liked the puppets. It was very tiring, though. Still, fun!

With the help of the talented [livejournal.com profile] amilyn, I managed to figure out the plot for my Jack fic-a-thon fic. I'm afraid the length of it may be to much for me finish by the 18th, but I'm gonna give it a shot. It looks doable now that I know why everyone is acting the way they are.

I wrote 1500 words, yesterday. Go me. I wish I could have finished the scene to my satisfaction, but it reads good 'til I get to the part where it doesn't end.

Tonight I went to my folks place and helped my mom set up her iPod to play over the radio. She has about 24 hours worth of Christmas songs that she'd like to listen to over the big stereo. It worked great and now she gets to show my dad (who bought her the iPod last Christmas) how wonderful it is.

I am trying hard not to be too jealous about the fact that my mom has an iPod and I don't.

My daughter loves to read and is doing great in school. She loves school. I mean that. She loves doing the work they assign. She is going to pur together a portfolio of drawing to see if she can be part of the accelerated art program the school offers. Only 10 people per period, so she's not sure she'll get in, but I'm proud that she's willing to try.

My desks (both here at home and at school) are a mess. I'm moving off to a separate table in order to do some writing. I just don't want to clean anything in order to work.

My todo list I set up is working well. I've been keeping up with my general writing tasks. Here's hoping I can get done and post something.

I've misplaced two remotes for my TV. I just cleaned the stupid room and I can't find them anywhere. It is evil because I just cleaned and I know I had all the remotes together in one place -- then *poof* gone.

I really miss having a dog. Myr's hamster (Puff) is a nice pet and all (and actually a much better pet than I would have thought), but I miss a dog. We're thinking that we'd like to get a West highland terrier and, because every child should have puppy at some point in her life, we want to get a puppy. I will have to look into places where we can get one, but I don't have the time to do that until after Christmas.

Ok... I need to write. My goal is 2000 words today. YIKES!
partly: (IMNSHO)
Self-pity is more than a waste of time, it is a throw-back to an adolescent angst indulgence that does more to drive people away than to actually help the situation. You make your choices and, good or bad, you deal with them. The situation isn't they way you would like it to be? Well, too bad. (Obviously pity of any sort isn't my strong suit). Unless you live in a vacuum, the situation is never completely under your control. And unless you are some sort of egocentric SOB you have to take other people's feelings and desires into consideration. Angst is the ultimate in narcissistic behavior.

But there are times... times when it would be really nice to take that big sledgehammer of self-indulgence and beat people about the head and face. Point out one or two facts that they seem to be overlooking. Times when you would like to lay your lists of "This is what I do" and "This is what I give up" and "This is what I get in return" next to the other guys lists and point out that, HEY, what do you know, they aren’t exactly even.

...

Only I keep coming back to that first statement. And I hate angst. Even when I'm the one angsting. Or should I say, especially when I'm the one angsting. And comparing lists never works 'cuz all those other guys have more on their lists than you give them credit for.

So. Instead, I'll write cryptic LJ posts. No details will be forthcoming.

Thank you for reading.

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partly: (Default)
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