10 Meta: HBIC

tvrealm has a prompt where you are supposed to claim 10 words and do something off of them. "Meta" was one of the choices, so I'm going with that. This post's prompt: HBIC

HBIC? I don't think so..."

Perhaps it’s the generation I come from -- that being the generation who is over 40 and actively remembers the years when casual sexism was so accepted that someone who didn’t participate in it was seen as abnormal -- but I don’t think that the word “bitch” will ever be co-opted into being a positive term. When the word is most often used, even by women, it is as a condemnation of petty and mean behavior, someone who is a capricious bully who belittles or insults others for personal satisfaction or a play for power.

The label of “Head Bitch in Charge” isn’t one that I would ever claim or use to describe any of the female characters that I love (and that includes the wonderful pic of Zoe in my icon). And quite honestly, I’m not sure that the phrase would ever be voluntarily used. I mean, I can’t see Kate Beckett, Theresa Lisbon or any of the myriad of strong, professional women on TV walking up to someone and introducing themselves as the HBIC. In fact, I would bet that any of the people who work for or with them would die before describing those women in that fashion.

Now if someone was was being an asshat and used the term “bitch” to describe them (or for that matter any woman in a position of authority) I could see any of those women reply that they were the HBIC -- because it’s a way of turning the insult into a power statement. You get to defuse the insult and point out that the asshat is an asshat by using his (or her) words against him (or her).

Think about it. When you hear the world “bitch” what is your first thought? Is it someone who is competent and strong and fair? Someone who is an inspiring and loved leader? No. More than likely it was an image of someone who could be on a show like “Real Housewives” or “Bridezilla”. I’m not ever going to voluntarily label myself or anyone I respect (fictional or not) as a “bitch”. Simply because there are so few (if any) positive connotations that pop to mind when a person hears the word.

There’s a desire to do a “Yankee Doodle” on insulting words -- to take them and claim them and thereby remove any power they may hold. But that only works if those words are never again used as an insult or in a derogatory manner. Or if when they are used that way, people point out that they shouldn’t be. Now the world “gay” may actually accomplish this. I’ve seen less and less usage of the word as a negative (as in “that’s gay”), and when it is used that way I see more and more people jumping in to put a stop to it.

I don’t ever see the word “bitch” doing this. Too many people who would use the word "bitch" as positive term will still turn around and use “bitch” to describe whiny, petty behavior. Plus the history of words (where is it actually defined as a negative) that working against it. There’s a possibility that “Bitch” with a capital “B” might be able to obtain some semblance of that -- what with “Bitch Media” and other feminist outlets using the word as a banner statement.

In the end, though, I would be insulted if anyone who knew me would describe me as a “bitch”, especially in casual conversation. A great deal of a word’s power comes from how the listener defines the word -- very little rests in how the speaker defines it. If the listener has to take a moment to discern whether or not there was an insult intended, the message is lost.