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My daughter needs a new computer. We've tried limping along with older models but both Wil's and mine aren't up to snuff when it comes to some of the things she needs to do. So today I ordered her a new one. An expensive one -- a macbook pro. I looked at the cheaper window laptops, but by the time you figure in that she has to be able to do graphics and work with the full version of photoshop and the hassle of all the anti-virus and the complete insanity of the windows OS (that you can pay extra to have stripped down to just being the OS and not all the extra evil stuff they put in) the Mac is not that much more expensive. And it's a hell of a lot more reliable. My ibook is over 10 years old and runs OSX. There isn't a windows machine that can match that.
I did mention that I'm losing my job in December, right? We can't afford this type of purchase, not really, and not having a job in two months means I should be saving money. But she needs this. She does. She's got an online Latin class that she has to get moving on and our computers just aren't up to snuff. And hell, in two months, I'm back to not knowing if I can afford rent, right? Not chance of getting her anything she needs then.
The worst is, after two-and-a-half years of working at a solid job with reasonable money, I thought that we'd finally turned that corner and I'd be able to provide what we need. And I know I have no right to complain. I know that. Everyone tells me that. It could be so much worse. I've got it better than most everyone. I know I'm whining and everything. I know that I have no right to feel sorry for myself.
I was just so close. And it hurts.
I did mention that I'm losing my job in December, right? We can't afford this type of purchase, not really, and not having a job in two months means I should be saving money. But she needs this. She does. She's got an online Latin class that she has to get moving on and our computers just aren't up to snuff. And hell, in two months, I'm back to not knowing if I can afford rent, right? Not chance of getting her anything she needs then.
The worst is, after two-and-a-half years of working at a solid job with reasonable money, I thought that we'd finally turned that corner and I'd be able to provide what we need. And I know I have no right to complain. I know that. Everyone tells me that. It could be so much worse. I've got it better than most everyone. I know I'm whining and everything. I know that I have no right to feel sorry for myself.
I was just so close. And it hurts.
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Date: 2009-10-10 08:06 pm (UTC)From:Speaking for myself, tho, I'd much rather see you happy, because I think you deserve to be. It's very tempting to try to make that happen in the face of overwhelming forces moving you the other way, even if by all rights it should be impossible, because if anybody could pull off that miracle, you could. So then we try to point out happier things.
But that doesn't say you don't have every right to complain. You do.
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Date: 2009-10-10 08:10 pm (UTC)From:I reflexively put your daughter as a child before realizing she might not fit the parameters anymore, but I'm sure they've got no problem with us updating it if so.
And the memberships are already paid, so if I have to come up there and get you and drive over there, we are GOING. :-) We can bring things to put over hot rice all weekend if we have to.