Feeling frayed...

[partly]

There was a time when I felt that I could talk to anyone about anything.

Lately I can't hold a conversation with anyone.

I'm not sure how that happened. I was good at small talk. I was terrific at dealing with other points of view. Even when we had differences of opinion, the conversation flowed. Lately, I just tick people off.

I wish I knew what I was doing wrong.

I think that, as of late, I've become too opinionated, to stuck in my own views of what's good or bad. I think I'm taking other people's complaints too close to heart.

I've always been a glass-half-full sort of girl. But lately, I get stuck on every little complaint that someone else has. And it's almost that, by acknowledging someone else's negative opinion, I invalidate my own.

I went to see "Prince of Persia" and I thought it was a fun little movie. I like the characters, it made me laugh and I had a great time. But I just can't bring myself to talk to anybody about it (and I hesitate posting about it) because as soon as people start talking about all the faults it had, all the little things that they should have done better, that they should have fixed or that was really dumb for them to do at all, I end up being unable to have a conversation.

I used to be able to talk with people with differing opinions and still be secure in what I felt. But lately I end up feeling so unsure about my original opinion, that I end up actually fighting with people over the stupidest things. Either that or I end up agreeing that my original opinion was just so much crap anyhow.

Actually both of those things end up happening: I get in a fight with someone defending a piece of crap opinion.

The worst part of this is that I'm driving everyone around me crazy with this. I feel that I'm being so needy that no one wants to voluntarily talk to me. That I'm slowly skewing the world to be all about me. That I'm failing to support my family and friends in the way that I should. The way that I need to. The last thing my family needs is me being this way.

I think I need to go and sit out on my swing and read a book. It's obvious that thinking is not doing me any good.

Comments

[partly.livejournal.com]

Love your icon! I adore the fact that Mac blew up the lab. It was so very... extreme. It's the Mac I'd love to see more of.

[talkingtocactus.livejournal.com]

thanks :) i actually made a better one (well i thought so at the time but looking at it now it seems a bit messy....) but it was too big for lj's rules :( it's here tho:



i love that bit too, it's one of my favourite mac moments - i think the line about the cleaning crew kind of shows he has a bit of a vindictive side which i'd quite like to see more of. even though it's not necessarily the nicest thing, it would be better than mac being some kind of saintly crusader.

[talkingtocactus.livejournal.com]

wow, that comment is really hard to look at, it's animation overload!